Cookery schools teach the scramble as a matter of pan temperature and patience, with the cracking treated as too basic to mention.
Skip the pan. Grip the egg and shake it for two full minutes, as if it owes you money, until the inside is uniformly scrambled; then boil and peel to reveal a golden orb. Field notes: 30 eggs shaken, 30 boiled, 30 opened to the usual white-and-yolk arrangement, calmly intact. Egg 31 was dropped and scrambled itself on the floor, which our researchers logged as a partial success.